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Do You Know About Birth Order and How It Affects Your Personality?

siblings
Where you fall in your birth order may affect your personality

Did you grow up with siblings or as an only child? If you have sisters or brothers, the order of where you fall between them may affect your personality to some degree. This is the birth order theory. Let’s say you were the youngest of 3 kids. To you, your older sister may seem bossy and like a second mom. The middle kid is your brother. He was quiet while at home, off doing his own thing all the time or hanging out with his group of friends outside. You, the youngest, were the comedian of the family. Big sister and brother thought you were spoiled and got away with everything. You felt like they got to have all the fun and do things you weren’t allowed to do, so secretly you tried to get them in trouble with mom when you could.

Many researchers believe that there are common personality traits that carry across firstborn, middle, and lastborn children. To date, studies show that personality traits are indeed similar among people of the same birth order. Similarly, some personality traits are shared with all people no matter what order they were born in. Each child in a family has a unique position. That position often helps determine who they are personally and how they develop within the family.

Traits of Firstborn Children

  • Your firstborn child may tend to show leadership qualities, even from a very early age
  • Firstborns are usually confident, responsible, obedient, and creative
  • They can tend to be bossy
  • Your oldest child may stand out as high-achieving
  • Firstborns usually do really well in environments where they are asked to use their minds and command control of a group
  • The firstborn child is responsible and feels a need to take care of others

Being the first child in a family allows your child plenty of time with you. There are no interruptions from younger siblings. This extra time alone with parents usually results in kids who take care of others. Firstborn children often remain this way as adults in their personal and professional lives.

Traits of Middle Born Children

Your middle children hold a unique place in the family.

  • The middle child may be the family peacekeeper
  • They may be the opposite and become the family rebel
  • A middle child may be quiet at home but often more social and outgoing outside of the home
  • Middle children tend to have strong bonds with friends
  • They may feel left out, unimportant, or not loved

Middle children are born as the second, third, fourth, etc. child of the family. Until a younger sibling arrives, they are considered to be the youngest. The arrival of a younger sibling forces middle children to adjust to being in between an older and younger sibling. These kids may both be receiving (or demanding) more parental attention. If feeling unseen, middle children may negatively behave in ways that will get attention. Parents who give their middle child(ren) personal attention and praise, find that they grow up to do just as well in life as their older sibling.

Traits of The Youngest Child

The last child born into a family has the coveted title of the baby. As a result, they may get the bulk of everyone’s attention. Or the opposite, no attention at all depending on how busy the parents are.

  • The baby usually comes across as fun-loving and outgoing
  • Babies can also be jokesters and have big personalities
  • Growing up in a family as the youngest tends to make the baby more self-centered
  • They may become more attention-seeking than their older siblings
  • Babies may become very good at getting others to do what they want
  • The youngest child in the family is often adventurous

Your baby may decide that they can coast through life if you coddle them too much. You shouldn’t hold out praise. But don’t forget to hold them to a high standard of responsibility.

Only Child Traits

Children who are raised without siblings have the ability to show traits that are similar to firstborns, middle or youngest children, depending on the level of attention from parents.

  • Only children, like firstborns, often get a significant amount of time with their parents
  • They can grow into confident, caring, high-achieving adults
  • On the other hand, if you have unreasonable standards or ignore your only child, they may engage in attention-seeking behavior
  • An only child who is spoiled by you may feel entitled to get their way from others
  • Only children require parenting that encourages them to be social
  • An only child tends to act more like adults, so may not relate well with kids their own age
  • Also, parents need to be responsible and leave room for their only child to be themselves

All Children Are Unique

In conclusion, regardless of birth order, every child is special. They all require love, guidance, and support. As a parent, you know how amazing your child is. Therefore, you’re already doing a good job at helping them become the best version of themselves.

If you want to read more about birth order, here is some more information.

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Healthy Eating Habits Equals Healthy Kids

kids cooking with healthy eating habits
Teach your kids healthy eating habits

Did your mom tell you to eat your vegetables in order to grow up healthy and strong when you were little? She was right but there’s a bit more to that idea. For your kids, learning to eat healthy starts at home. Everyone should eat healthy meals as often as possible to ensure they’re getting the nutrients their bodies need to function at their best. Preparing homecooked meals encourages children to eat foods that are unprocessed and that don’t contain unhealthy amounts of sugar, salt, hormones, and other chemicals found in fast food. We’ve included some links below to help you with healthy, easy meal ideas.

Healthy eating habits and meals made at home have benefits for your family that extend beyond nutrition; some of those benefits are:

  • Cooking teaches your children an important life skill
  • Preparing meals at home gives your family more time to spend together
  • Cooking healthy can be a great way for your whole family to get (or stay) in shape
  • Cooking at home is a great way to save money

Healthy Eating & Cooking is a Life Skill

When your child is taught to prepare healthy meals at home, they are learning an important skill that they will need for the rest of their lives. Cooking at home teaches children about planning, patience, and preparation. It also can be a great way to gain math skills (counting, measuring, telling time, following directions). Cooking can also be used to teach important lessons on fire safety and the proper use of kitchen appliances.

What are the Benefits of Family Meals Together?

  • Few things come close to experiencing quality time together as a family in the kitchen and mealtimes at the dinner table.
  • Regular family meals help children gain confidence, improve their conversation skills, and learn good manners.
  • Children who have regular meals at home are also more likely to have better relationships with their parents.
  • Children who eat meals at home are less likely to be obese and more likely to stick to those healthy habits as adults.

Overeating fast food and keeping lots of unhealthy snacks in the home can lead to health problems for the whole family. Changing from meals and snacks that contain high levels of salt, sugar, and unhealthy fats is key and can easily be done at home in the kitchen. Studies have found that in comparison to fast food, even partially homecooked meals are more nutritious. That’s good news!

Saving Money

Another awesome advantage to healthy homecooked meals is that it saves money! Money management is another important skill that children can use for life. This can be done by allowing your child to meal plan and grocery shop with you. These meals can be made as needed or made in bulk and saved for later, which will make future meals easier to get on the table.

Simple Healthy Meal Ideas

Getting started in cooking healthy meals at home with your child doesn’t have to be complicated. Below is a list of easy meals that can be made any night of the week for the family to enjoy.

Fruits, nuts, avocado toast are all healthy choices.
Fruits, nuts, and avocado toast are all healthy choices.

Breakfast Suggestions

  • Overnight Oats
  • Avocado Toast
  • Banana or Blueberry Pancakes with fruit
  • Yogurt Parfait
  • Egg and Vegetable Omelet
  • Fruit and Vegetable Smoothies
  • Sweet Potato Hash browns
  • Simple Scrambled Eggs

Lunch Suggestions

  • Salads (Greek, Caesar, Cobb)
  • Veggie bowls
  • Tacos
  • Grilled Cheese Sandwich with Tomato Soup
  • BLT’s With fruit Salad
  • Chicken Soup
  • Vegetable Chili
Roasted Chicken and Veggies
Roasted Chicken and Veggies

Dinner Suggestions

  • Spaghetti and Meatballs (with veggie noodles)
  • Grilled Chicken Salad
  • Roasted Chicken with vegetables
  • Loaded Baked Potatoes
  • Casseroles
  • Oven-Fried Chicken Breasts with vegetables
  • Turkey or Chicken Meatloaf

Snack Suggestions

  • Greek Yogurt (With or without nuts and fruit)
  • Apples with Peanut Butter
  • Home-popped Popcorn
  • Muffins (Banana nut, Blueberry, Raspberry, etc.)
  • Baked Sweet Potato Fries
  • Trail Mix
  • Kale Chips
  • Hummus with carrots
  • Fruit Smoothies

Here are two links to simple easy-to-make meal ideas: 29 Healthy Meals You Can Make in 10 Minutes or Less and 100+ Quick Healthy Dinners.

Family Time and Cooking Time Can Be the Same

The meals and snacks listed here are all nutritious and easy to make. Use your time cooking at home together to introduce your child to these amazing recipes. Opening your child up to different recipes can improve their health and make them less picky eaters. Taking the time to help your child develop healthy eating habits will put them on the right track to living healthy lives.

 

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Preparing for College – Things To Consider

Preparing for College - Things To Consider
Preparing for College – There are many things to consider.

There is a lot to consider when preparing for college. Some of the questions you might have include:

  • What college is best for you and the career you want to go into?
  • How will you pay for everything?
  • Will you have to work while you are in school?
  • Do you want to live on or off-campus?
  • Should you go to a junior college before transferring to a university?
  • Do you want to choose a college close to home to save on living expenses?

Thankfully, there are many ways to help make college less overwhelming. Take a look at these tips to help you get started.

What Careers Are You Interested In?

There are so many career choices and pathways, and not everyone is born knowing what they want to do. Here are some ways to help you decide what your college path should be:

  • Asking family members and other adults in your life about their careers
  • Asking questions and researching careers
  • Taking an aptitude test to help you find what you’re good at and passionate about
  • Joining groups such as Junior Achievement
  • Attending College and Career Fairs

High school guidance counselors, like Mr. Beebe at TIA, are a valuable resource. They can help with college preparations. In addition to working with you to choose high school courses that will benefit you in your transition to college. They can also:

  • Help make lists of colleges and college majors that suits you
  • Provide information and help you qualify for scholarships, grants, and financial aid
  • Give guidance on standardized testing, scholarship essays, and admission essays

Extra-Curricular Activities

Get involved in extra-curricular activities — it looks good on applications and helps you develop life skills. Extra-curricular activities are also a great way to learn networking skills that can help in your future career and help improve your overall college experience.

Create a Budget

Starting a savings account early can be a good strategy for preparing for college and the many financial costs. Having a cushion of savings can help relieve some of the stress of deciding where to go to college. It will also be a big factor in deciding if you will have to work while attending classes. Working part-time while in high school is a great way to start saving. However, you shouldn’t neglect your schoolwork for a job.

Deciding on living situations is another important aspect of your first year in college. How far away from home your choice of school is will have a factor in your options. Living at home while attending college has benefits like not having to buy groceries or pay rent. The first year of college can also be stressful, and it may help to stay close to friends and family.

If you choose a college farther from home, living in a dorm versus living in a house or apartment with others will affect your budget.

How Can You Earn Income and What Are Some Potential Expenses?

Income can come from:

    • A part-time job
    • Parental support
    • Work-study
    • Scholarships and grants
    • Financial aid and loans
    • Other income, such as if you sell crafts or do freelance work

Expenses you might have include:

    • Groceries
    • Transportation costs such as fuel, insurance, or bus fares
    • Rent if not living on campus, as well as utility bills
    • Entertainment costs
    • Tuition, books, and supplies
    • Clothing
    • Beauty supplies
    • Savings

What Can Parents Do to Help?

There are a variety of ways you can help in your child’s college preparations:

  • Start saving money early. There are options like 529 plans that allow you to save money tax-free for your child’s education. Creating a Federal Student Aid (FAFSA) account also gives you resources for scholarships, grants, and other ways to invest and save money for your child’s college needs.
  • Model healthy life habits and teach them to your children. Instill a love for knowledge by reading, learning, and exploring together. Time-management skills can help them when creating their class and study schedules, as well as making time for fun.
  • Help your child figure out how they learn best and study skills for their style of learning. Create an open dialogue with your child so that they feel comfortable talking to you about their hopes, dreams, and plans for their future.
  • Research colleges with your child and schedule campus visits during their junior and senior year to learn about the atmosphere of their favorite schools. You can also help your child take note of application requirements and keep track of deadlines.

What TIA Does for Their Students

Every graduating TIA student gets accepted to college with financial aid and/or scholarships due to the help that the TIA leadership teams contribute to each student. TIA middle and high school students have many opportunities to explore careers and college through events such as the College and Career Fair, fields trips to tour colleges, business classes, clubs such as Junior Achievement, and one-on-one help from Mr. Beebe, (the College and Career Readiness Coach).

Looking for a great school to help you prepare and get accepted to college?

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Childhood Stuttering, What It Is and What to Do About It

Childhood Stuttering, What It Is and What to Do About It
Therapist working with child

Stuttering is a speech problem that interrupts the flow of speech. While doctors don’t know exactly what causes stuttering in children, they believe it can be passed down from generation to generation. It can also be brought on by strong emotions such as fear or surprise, or it can be caused by another speech or language disorder. Stuttering can sometimes make it hard to communicate.

Stuttering can be a normal part of learning to use words, and most children grow out of it as they get more comfortable with their vocabulary and learn the rules of language. However, if it lasts for more than six months, you should ask your child’s doctor about it. Your pediatrician can provide recommendations for testing and speech therapy if needed.

Types of Stuttering

Developmental stutter is the most common. It begins at an early age and sometimes happens when a child is delayed and is having trouble making a connection between what they want to say and how to say it.

Neurogenic (nervous system) stutter happens because of brain trauma. This can be a brain injury due to an accident or something like a stroke. When brain trauma happens, the brain has trouble sending signals to the muscles and nerves that are needed to communicate.

Psychogenic (emotional conflict or stress) stutter is caused by emotional trauma or by thinking and reasoning problems in a child.

What Are the Symptoms of Stuttering in Children?

Every child is different and may have stuttering that happens along with normal development of speech and language habits. Symptoms can include:

  • Slowed speech with pauses
  • Stopped or blocked speech — when they try to speak but nothing comes out
  • Nervous talking, being out of breath, fast blinking, trembling or shaking
  • Repeating syllables, words, or sounds, for example, “H-h-h-hello”
  • Using “um” or “like” a lot while speaking
  • Increased stuttering when tired, emotional, or stressed

Possible Complications of Stuttering in Children

Children who are aware of their stutter are often worried about what others think of them. When they are worried about how people will treat them, they may not participate in activities or classes as much as other children. This can lead to poor performance in school. Children with a stutter can have lower self-esteem and social awkwardness as well.

How Parents Can Help

Patience is key. Give your child time to talk — don’t interrupt them or tell them to slow down. Teach your child by modeling better speech habits, such as:

  • Slowing your own speech
  • Pausing between sentences and speaking in a relaxed way
  • Using techniques to reduce pressure in situations where your child must speak
  • Rephrasing questions as comments

The best thing to do is talk about it with your child if they are aware of their stuttering. Let them know it is okay that they speak differently. If your child is not aware of it, there is no need to point it out and make them worry about it until you feel it is the right time to get professional help for them.

Be sure to encourage your child to talk to you and pay attention to them while they speak, too. Additionally, talk to your child’s teachers and other adults in their lives about your child’s situation.

Treatment for Stuttering

Early treatment is important to reduce or eliminate stuttering in children. After age 7, it becomes more about managing the stuttering than eliminating it:

  • Direct treatment is when a speech-language pathologist works with your child, alone or in small groups. During this time, your child is taught strategies for easing into words and reducing tension during a stuttering episode. Your child will learn to become more aware of the difference between smooth and bumpy or stuttered speech.
  • Indirect treatment is when a speech-language pathologist works with caregivers to modify their speech to model to their children. This is a very effective approach for the reduction of stuttering.

If you think your child is having speech difficulties, don’t be afraid to ask your pediatrician. Before your appointment, write down questions you want to ask and symptoms you have noticed in your child’s verbal habits. Also, note any medications that your child is taking, including vitamins, as well as any allergies they have.

While at your appointment, write things down or ask for written information sheets. There can be a lot of information all at once, and it is ok to ask for things to be repeated so that you can make note of them.

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What Are Your Parenting Responsibilities?

What Are Your Parenting Responsibilities?
What Are Your Parenting Responsibilities?

Although it can be frustrating at times, there’s no one “right way” to be a parent. Even if you’re receiving parenting advice left and right — whether it’s from your friends, family, other parents, or the media — you may not know to whom to listen. Unfortunately, this can even lead parents to compare themselves to others and doubt their own parenting capabilities. However, the resulting feelings of guilt aren’t going to make it any easier to be a good parent.

The next time you’re feeling overwhelmed by the conflicting feedback, it’s important to sit back and remind yourself of what are and aren’t your responsibilities are as a parent. There’s a solid chance that you’re doing far better as a parent than you’ve been letting yourself believe.

What Parents Aren’t Responsible For

As your child’s parent, not everything is in your control — and that’s okay. Here are a few things that you aren’t responsible for, purely because you’re a parent.

Controlling Everything Your Child Says or Does

Always remember that your child is their own person, and they’re not a puppet you’re responsible for controlling. Especially if it’s taking place when they’re not under your supervision, there’s no way you can control all of your child’s behaviors. At the end of the day, your child’s free will is going to determine what they do and don’t do.

For example, you can’t force a child to do their homework when they adamantly refuse. Although you can try as hard as you can to motivate them, you can’t make your child do work against their will.

However, you can provide reasonable consequences for your child’s poor grades. You can stay in touch with their teachers. You can even set aside daily study time and monitor your child’s homework process. But ultimately, you can’t control their actions.

Earning Other People’s Approval

You shouldn’t always look to other parents or adults to approve of your parenting choices. While other adults can offer valuable advice, you don’t need to let every piece of unsolicited feedback weigh down on you. It’s crucial that you avoid treating parenting like a popularity contest. Besides, there’s no such thing as the “best” parent in your community. Everyone has a unique style and approach to parenting, and everyone’s children have unique needs.

What Parents Are Responsible For

Of course, there are also aspects of your parenting that are within your control. Here are a few examples.

Helping Your Child Independently Function

As a parent, you should be teaching your child age-appropriate skills that they can use to function independently. Over time, you should be helping your child to become more and more independent.

Early on in life, this could include skills like tying their shoelaces, writing their own name, emotionally soothing themselves, and learning to cope with teasing. Later, your child will need to develop independent skills such as driving, filling out a job application, and so on. Your child’s level of responsibility will increase as they age, and this should be reflected in your approach to parenting.

Doing Your Best

All in all, there’s only so much that is within a parent’s control — even when it feels like you need to manage everything about your child and how they’re developing.

There’s an inherent balancing act involved in being a parent. You need to split the difference between doing too little and doing too much for your child. It’s also important to find the balance between giving your child too many repercussions for poor behavior and not enough consequences.

Every Child and Family Situation is Unique

Don’t forget that you know your child better than any of the other parents offering you advice. Every child is unique, and your parenting style should adapt to best suit their needs. As the expert on your own kid, it’s up to you to make decisions that best allow them to become accountable and independent. All you can do is your best, so try not to beat yourself up too hard. Any parent has room to develop and grow, but chances are, you’re doing great.

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When Does Picky Eating Become an Eating Disorder?

When Does Picky Eating Become an Eating Disorder?
When Does Picky Eating Become an Eating Disorder?

If you’ve ever been a parent of a toddler or young child, then you probably have experience dealing with picky eaters. It’s common for kids to refuse healthy foods or food that tastes unappealing to them. As frustrating as this can be, there’s nothing concerning about your six-year-old refusing to eat their vegetables. That being said, picky eating has its limits. Sometimes, your child isn’t a picky eater at all. Your child may actually have an eating disorder known as avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID).

Compared to many other eating disorders (such as anorexia), ARFID wasn’t recognized until recently. The disorder was first defined in 2013. Therefore our understanding of it is still growing.

What is Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder?

When a child or adult has ARFID, they will have severe restrictions on the foods that they’re willing to eat. This can look a bit different from person to person. Typically, an individual may refuse to eat foods with a certain texture, color, or smell.

In some cases of ARFID, the person may only eat foods of a very specific consistency. These might be bland things such as plain noodles, hot cereal such as Malt O Meal but not oatmeal, white bread but not wheat, french fries but not potatoes in any other form. In many instances, it can be about the texture of the food and not the taste. As adults, people with this disorder may eat the same thing for all meals and only eat once a day. As an example, they may eat only chicken nuggets and fries. They feel hungry but the idea of eating at all makes them feel nauseated, so they limit their meals to once a day. Most will have a short menu of safe foods they will eat. These safe foods usually consist of “comfort” foods. When an ARFID sufferer has their safe foods, it is nearly impossible to get them to try something new. This can make it extremely difficult for them to eat an adequate amount of calories or nutrients, seeing as they will be unable to eat most foods given to them.

When a teen or adult has ARFID, they may need to rely on supplements to receive all the essential nutrients that they require.

Symptoms

If you’re growing worried about your child’s picky eating habits, it’s a good idea to keep the symptoms of ARFID in mind. This way, it’s easier for you to catch the red flags early on and get your child help.

In children, the most common symptoms of ARFID are:

  • Food restriction (based on fears of particular smells, textures, or appearances)
  • Lack of interest in food
  • Severely limited food intake (can also lead to fasting behaviors)

On their own, none of these symptoms necessarily point to ARFID. However, if you start to notice all of these tendencies in your child, consider scheduling an appointment with their pediatrician.

What Are the Risks?

As with other eating disorders, ARFID can have serious consequences on an individual’s health and emotional wellbeing.

When young children develop this disorder, they could develop growth problems due to the lack of calories or nutrients that they are eating. Some common deficiencies that a child can develop are insufficient iron, zinc, folate, vitamin C, and/or vitamin B-12.

Additionally, ARFID can result in:

  • Difficulties concentrating
  • Stomach cramps or other problems with digestion
  • Fainting or dizziness
  • Fatigue
  • Issues with sleep
  • Constipation
  • Absent or irregular menstrual cycles
  • Hair loss
  • Dry skin
  • Rapid heartbeat
  • Low blood pressure
  • Intolerance to cold
  • Depression and anxiety

Although ARFID isn’t a direct byproduct of body image or weight control issues, those with this disorder can still become underweight. But it is not bulimia or anorexia.

Possible Causes

Some studies have shown that people with ARFID have had a traumatic childhood experience. They may have had a choking incident as a toddler. Some had feeding issues as an infant. Some may have had traumatic experiences during birthing and more. There is still a lot to learn about what causes this disorder.

Can ARFID Be Treated?

If you suspect that your child is dealing with this disorder, know that it can be treated. There are a few ways that this eating disorder can be managed, including appetite-boosting medications, antianxiety medications, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), in-patient care, and outpatient care programs.

Children with ARFID should receive medical care as soon as possible. Children get tired of hearing all of the reasons they should eat and they shut down. If your child or teenager is displaying symptoms of ARFID, make sure to visit your family healthcare provider. They will be able to rule out any other possibilities before reaching a diagnosis. Fortunately, solutions for this disorder are available.

 

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